Chris patrick, the light
“I’m so lost
I don’t ever think I’ll be found
I always feel like I’m trapped
Always feel like I’m down
It’s hard to swim in a world
When the homies are taught to drown
It’s lonely upon these grounds”
― “Gray”
“Dreams” by East Orange, New Jersey rapper Chris Patrick mentions in the first verse how shifts at Best Buy kept him from pursuing music full time. “I be out at Best Buy selling niggas RAM and they think that I’m the best guy for helping spend they bands, how the fuck I’m finna get by? Niggas need a plan, of action,” he raps, dissatisfaction worn on every word.
The frustration doesn’t last. Self-belief builds as the flow accelerates. Each line builds up to his voice cracking as, “Went from talking with my therapist to tour bus talks with J.I.D,” lunges out of him like inmates escaping confinement. It’s a full-hearted performance, closing with, “Mizzy just sent me a text that said, ‘Someday we gon be big, nigga.”
Because I discovered Chris Patrick while reading the The Count of Monte Cristo, what I hear in his music, specifically his latest mixtape, From The Heart, Vol. 2, is Edmond Dantes, wrongfully imprisoned in the Château d'If, spending every day moving bricks in secret with Abbé Faria, dreaming of the treasure awaiting them if they can escape their captivity.
When I hear “Tired,” where he raps, “Tired of running, tired of ducking, tired of hustling, tired of dumbing down these fucking lyrics so you motherfuckers get it,” it’s one of serveral outbursts expressed with a yelp that would impress Walt Whitman due to all the years of living dormant, punching clocks, pinching pennies, all while seeing dreamchasers make their dreams come true.
New Jersey, home of Whitman and Mach-Hommy, Allen Ginsburg and Amiri Baraka, Joe Budden and Lauryn Hill, all great poets and rappers who used words to express their raw emotions. They all took soul-bearing literally, leaving no feeling unturned. It’s the emotive kind of writing that Chris Patrick also conveys. Creating music that represents the suppressed screams of a man trying to get out.
Out of his job, out of his uniform, out of this unfulfillment.
Storytellers have historically needed some kind of arresting charm. To be a rapper, you need vocals that keep spectators spectating. Chris raps with a voice that carries emotion in the crevice of every vowel. You can feel the optimism, the jolly enthusiasm, but also pain, the inner and outer hurt that speaks to hip hop’s relationship with mental health.
There’s something very blog era about him. I can’t shake the J. Cole and Wale déjà vu. Seeing him is to see them, back when they were men of dreams and potential but lacked the polish of a major label or substantial financial backing. Every couple of years, without fail, a new, unknown rapper emerges with a record that captures the spirit of dream chasing. They can sound bright-eyed or starved, self-assured or pensive, the feeling varies depending on the artist and their circumstances.
If we are what we eat, Chris Patrick has been filling the growling pangs of empty fulfillment with a bowl of hope, a piece of prayer, an ounce of certainty, and a sprinkle of disillusion. Which all combines to give him a sound that is pure passion. He’s the most passionate new rapper I’ve heard at his level. The love for words is apparent in every verse. When his voice cracks and croaks it’s as if he’s being scorched from an attempt to breathe fire. Which reminds me of my favorite Abbe Faria quote:
“What would you not have accomplished if you had been free?"
"Possibly nothing at all; the overflow of my brain would probably, in a state of freedom, have evaporated in a thousand follies; misfortune is needed to bring to light the treasures of the human intellect. Compression is needed to explode gunpowder. Captivity has brought my mental faculties to a focus; and you are well aware that from the collision of clouds electricity is produced — from electricity, lightning, from lightning, illumination.”
Chris Patrick makes illuminating music. If Lil Durk gave him a nickname it would be The Light.